Monday, October 19, 2009

beautiful day

The sun is shining where we live for the first time in well over a week. Also, the temperature has climbed well over 20 degrees. The sun and the weather, well, it gives me hope. Maybe. I can't really say at this point that hope is streaming through my veins, because I can't imagine a day where a baby will actually be in our home. Sigh.

I'm sitting in the living room with the windows open. Outside, the mommy brigade sits in their lawn chairs, watching the gaggle of children playing outdoors. Ok, so why did we move to the suburbs? Oh yeah, for the same reason that we bought the SUV. Because we thought that we would have children. I tell you what, best laid plans.......

We're taking another break this month. I'm headed to a sunnier climate...the beach...for vacation with some girlfriends in a couple of weeks...the plus side to the negative cycle is that I can drink to my hearts content at the all-inclusive resort! Woohoo!

Interesting work comment today. One of my partners (who doesn't know about my IF)..who is also ten years older than me and pregnant...said that she is saving her maternity clothes for me, because she KNOWS that I will be pregnant soon. The way she said it was actually encouraging. Am I hanging on every little positive thread that I can take? Probably so.

I just wish the thread would come together into a rope and pull me out of this IF stuff. One can dream.


addingtothepack said...

Isn't it funny how some people's comments give you hope, when it seems like you can't rally any hope for your situation? Sometimes I am so glad that someone else can be hopeful for me (even if they have no idea that we are infertile).

A said...

I sure hope you'll need the hand-me-down's sooner than you think!

Lin said...

Hope you have an awesome time on the vacay! Drink up!!...while you can, that is! ;-) Hoping you're moving on to the hand-me-downs before you know it!

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry about your grandma. And about the BFN.

I'm just a week or two ahead of you. Last weekend I had my girl's vacation at the beach. Now I'm taking a little break to get mentally and physically healthy before we move on to IVF.

It's taken almost 5 weeks since the BFN, but I'm starting to be able to hope again. It really surprised me how hard it was to bounce back this time.

The weekend away did wonders for me. I hope it helps you, too! {{{hugs}}}