Yet another gal in our office is pregnant. In the past 12 months in an office of 30 people, we've had five pregnancies, one set of twins (no IF), and too many office baby showers to count. I'm tired of my happy smile and my celebratory congratulations. I'm so tired of putting on the happy face.
On the way home today, I entertained the thought of this IUI not working. I saw the next several months stretched ahead with shots, labs, ultrasounds, and BFN. All while every belly in my office but my own is growing. And then I thought, can I go through this again month after month after month? When does this end? When is the news happy?
I don't know the answer to those questions. I don't know if I'll be strong enough. I hope that I don't have to find out. But there is that reality that I might.
Today is just a down day. That's all.
- ▼ July (10)